“How should one live? Welcoming to all.”
~ Mechtilde of Magdeburg
“Welcoming means to accept others as they are, without
passing judgment on their worth….As we practice this
attitude toward others, regardless of their station in
life, regardless of their [skillful and unskillful]
actions, we are changed inside.
“Welcoming is a spiritual practice.”
~ “Touchstones — A Book Of Daily Meditations For Men” (Hazelden) 7/18*
How does this apply to my program?
*The change is brackets is mine. The original reads “good or bad”. Since that seems, in itself, binary and judgmental, I believe the change is appropriate to the thought.
This is a reprint of an earlier post. It still works.
People sometimes have questions concerning their drinking patterns and whether they might constitute signs of alcoholism. Typical among them are the issues of drinking alone, to relax, to “kill the pain,” and so forth. Many of these could apply to the non-medical or recreational use of drugs, as well as most process addictions.
First of all, lest drinkers object to being lumped together with drug users, let me point out that alcohol (ethanol) is a drug, and that drinking beverage alcohol is recreational drug use. Ethanol is not only a drug, it is one of the most lethal ones when used to excess. Simply withdrawing from alcohol, once addicted, can be fatal without medical supervision. So drinkers who like to tell themselves that they’re better than people who use drugs need to think again. The only differences are that their drug is cheaper, more easily acquired, and legal.
There is a quote attributed to one B. Franklin: “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” Certainly, there is nothing wrong with a couple of beers at the end of a hard day, and for 80 to 90% of the population, that’s all that drinking amounts to (if they bother to drink at all). But pointed questions need asking if we become uncomfortable when denied the beers. Continue reading →
As active addicts many of us had friends who were that in name only. Our mutual interests in acting out, trying to prolong our adolescence, and using each other for one end or another were often the sole basis of those “friendships.” How many of our using buddies tried to encourage us to continue our addictive behavior? “Hey, everyone does it!” “Oh, you’re not that bad.” “You just need to ____. You don’t have to ____!” Any of those sound familiar?
And just as tellingly, how many of our willing partners in excess stuck with us when we showed that we were serious about changing? Not too many, I’m guessing. Continue reading →