Social occasions that involve people in recovery—especially early recovery—can pose some perplexing problems for the hosts. On one hand, a host who is aware of a guest’s need to avoid mood-altering substances may wish to do what is possible to keep from exposing them to temptation. On the other hand, social drinking is a part of everyday American culture. Most social gatherings involve some drinking by some of the guests. A host may be at a loss as to how she ought to deal with guests in recovery — especially those only a short way along on their journey.
There are some simple things to remember….
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Thanks for the post.
I’ve surely been on both sides of the “Holiday party” issue. I’m and avid softball player and the guys on team all know I don’t drink so when we go out the bar after a practice or game to celebrate a win or commiserate a loss, they will sometimes do a round of shots. They take the time to make sure that my non-alcohol shot is even the color and make sure I pick the right one from the tray. Many years ago I thought maybe they would smirk but I quickly let that go!
Your comment about the alcoholic has to take care of himself at your holiday party is spot on. As a host, or hostess, you can only do so much.
They told me early on that I, and no one else, was responsible for my recovery. I’ve seen nothing in the succeeding 20 years to make me believe otherwise. Nonetheless, while we need to stay out of slippery places, our friends can do a lot — as yours do — to make them less slippery.