One of our biggest problems as addicts is that we pursue solutions that we like, rather than those we need.
Many times the best solutions to problems do not produce the outcomes that we want. Members who have been around the fellowships for awhile have seen it again and again: newcomers (and sometimes those not so new) who flail around and exhaust themselves trying to fight what more experienced folks see as inevitable: the need to make changes that we don’t like.
Usually, no one is saying that they need to be made all at once or right away. In fact, program wisdom indicates quite the opposite. In most cases not involving situations dire and immediate, we recommend that any changes be made slowly, with careful consideration of all factors. Since we’re all addicts and codependents, however, we tend to want to sweep things under the rug and ignore them indefinitely, or take the broom and beat them into submission. In either case, we want what we want and we want it now, and we want it the way we want it.*Continue reading →
As much as we might like to have it otherwise, healthy pleasure isn’t constant. Pleasure is the body’s way of rewarding us for doing things that benefit us: survival of our offspring and ourselves. But when pleasure becomes the norm, rather than the reward, the system breaks down. We begin to pursue pleasure for its own sake, to the neglect of nature’s original intentions. Continue reading →
Someone once said that “Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom,” and nowhere is that more true than in recovery – – especially in early recovery. Our addictions were full-time jobs, taking most of our time, attention and energy. Were that not the case, we would have felt no particular interest in escaping from them. Returning to reality takes all the time, energy and commitment we can bring to bear on the project. Our addict is unemployed, and as another old proverb goes, “The devil finds work for idle hands.” Continue reading →