One of the fellowships that I attend is focused, in the early stages, on the process of overcoming obsessions. Obsession of one kind or another is a big component of most addictions, but some more than others.
The interesting thing about obsession is that it is a vice best practiced while alone. Our brains go ’round and ’round, and we are unable to shake the undesirable thought pattern no matter how hard we try. Our minds keep coming back to it, him, her, that, those, and it can seem as though ridding ourselves of the thoughts is like trying to push toothpaste back into the tube. But put us in the presence of another human being with whom we have to interact, and things are different. Continue reading →
Most of us addicts became isolated from others, unable to relate to them in healthy ways. We either tried too hard, or not hard enough. When we found ourselves failing to fit in, we turned to “in groups” who thought like we did. Those may have been genuine efforts to find a place where we belonged, but since they were nearly always based on some form of addiction — drinking, drugging, gambling and so forth — we were associating with other wounded souls who were grasping but not able to hold onto that same feeling of belonging. Our isolation continued, even in a crowd.
The value of humor in relieving the tension of situations and increasing the enjoyment of life has been recorded by poets, playwrights and others for thousands of years. Humor brings people closer, cements social bonds (people who laugh at the same things we do are accepted, others are kept at arm’s length), and defuses tense moments. Continue reading →